Curious about CORN in your STOOL? warning: this blog is full of shit.

Aight, so this one might be a little gross but I don’t care! Don’t read it if you don’t want to know!

My girlfriend and I had a wonderful meal of soy patties with corn as a side dish, and I got to thinking (as I tend to do from time to time). Have you ever pooped and there was whole fucking pieces of corn in it?! I mean come on it’s just you reading this, you can be honest with yourself. I’m not saying that I have! I uhhh just heard it happens to other people once and a while. So yeah I did some intense research, well not that intense, and got some answers!

From what I found it all has to do with our digestive tract and our ever changing bodies.

Back in the day when our great great great great great times like a million grandparents ate (I’m talking cavemen/women) their digestive tracts weren’t exactly the same as ours (no shit right? figuratively of course not literally). Cave-folk didn’t eat a lot of meat, and their digestive tract was a lot longer which made it easier to digest plants and veggies and some crazy ancient berry we’ve never heard of. There’s also some theory the appendix had something to do with digesting too (I guess it doesn’t do a fucking thing now?)

Cave-peeps also had different teeth. Their teeth were bigger, and their mouths were too. So instead of getting your wisdom teeth pulled when you were a teen and given some Vicodin to pop, the mother fuckers actually fit in your mouth! and could mash the plants and what not to nice little bits before swallowed.

So back to the present, if you inhale your food like a sow, your going to probably swallow some pieces whole. On top of that, the digestive system today isn’t as good at digesting plants, much less whole kernels. The little corn goes through our stomach and intestines, and appear in our poo! (Well your poo, not mine. Like I said before it’s never happened to me.)

That’s it! If you don’t want to see those little yellow monsters in your poopy anymore, stop inhaling your food and chew the fuck out of it!

Oh how interesting the world is! Maybe you feel a bit smarter now? Maybe not. But hey now you can at least hit up the cute girl in gym class with a fun fact about her fecal matter! You’re welcome!

Have a good one everybody. Goodnight, and god bless.



13 hours and Tru Blood? Lord forgive me.

MAN I am pooped!

I went to bed last night at 8pm and woke up today at 9am… that’s 13 fucking hours of sleep! And honestly I had to push myself to wake up, so I wouldn’t feel like a total bum. What the hell?! Then I took an hour long shower. I’m normally the kind of guy that only needs 10 maybe 15 minutes max. I think I’m just in slow motion mode today. Everything that normally takes me a little bit of time to get done, I shall take hours to do! Good thing I work tonight.

Now on to this Tru Blood. Yes that’s right I’m watching Tru Blood. I blame my girlfriend 110%. I am a weak minded man who can’t help himself. I’m going to hell for sure I know. But damn this stuff is addicting! The show is pretty much soft core porn with vampires. That’s the best summary I got for you. I’m only on the 1st season.Visually the show is pretty fucking good. The story line is interesting too. Like any good show they leave you with a cliff hanger so your wanting more. The acting for the most part is good too! Except sometimes I get the feeling the main character (Sookie Stackhouse) is mentally challenged to say the least. That’s damsel’s in distress for ya…

I hear the show gets a bit crappier as you go on so maybe I’ll get out of this zone while I can still save my soul. I can’t believe the first show I’m plugging on this blog is Tru Blood. But yes I would say go out and watch it. The 1st season for sure. It’s not like that Twilight crap these vampires are fucked up.

Oh the opening credits are cool too! Check it!

I guess the show is based on The Southern Vampire Mysteries which is a series of books by Charlaine Harris. From what I heard the books are really good, or at least the first few any way. Might have to go give them a gander! As should you, because after all reading is so much better than watching the boob tube like a fuggin zombie right?


Now I’m off to make some BLT’s and watch a few more episodes of this damn show before another wonderful shift at work…

^Get it?! I’m eating a sandwich and watching a show about vampires^

hahahahhahahahahahhah come on that FUCKIN funny! YOU laughed! You know you did, if nothing else when you saw that cute picture you went “awwwwwwwwww” in your head.

Peace out mofo’s!





YOYOYO it’s only 11:30pm?! internets,randoms,oh and Back to the Future trivia!


So as you can see by the cleverly worded title, it’s only 11:30p.m. Still pretty early!

At the moment I am randomly searching the web for different points of interest that hit my brain at any random second. I would say a always have and oh and youtube! can’t forget that ever important source of entertainment.

Right now in the background my beautiful wonderful pregnant girlfriend is sound asleep because she has a wonderful job that makes her get up at 5AM!!!! Holy balls I think I would shoot myself if I had to get up that early on a regular basis. No no I’m much more happy staying up until 2am reading random shit, playing pokemon, and watching t.v. (currently on my television is the HILARIOUS show Reno 911! you must see this show if you have not already) And then waking up comfortably at 10am. God I’m a pussy compared to my old lady… she knows it too.

Oh ya here’s a crazy random fact I found out the other day! It will blow your mind if you didn’t know this already…

Michael J. Fox wasn’t the original person cast for Back to the Future!!!! WHAAAA??? Did you just read that correctly? yes… yes you did. Originally it was Eric Stoltz. ( The best thing I know him from is the drug dealer in Pulp Fiction) He filmed for 5 weeks as McFly then Fox stepped in! Crazzzzy shit. Don’t believe me eh? HERE’S A PICTURE!

Not Michael J. Fox!!!

Can I just say right now how different that whole trilogy would have been? I love Back to the Future! That’s my shit! Probably going to go on amazon after this and buy me the box set!


So yeah, there’s just a taste of the wonderful and uninteresting shit you will be getting into if you choose to continue to read this blog. Just so you know, I’m a aware I have horrid grammer skillz, it’s something I’m working on so GET OFF my back.

Oh quick shout out to my college professor (you know who you are if you read this!) because I totally stole this site from her to blog on, it’s so much easier to use so far, I think.